Well, I think I get a big, fat ZERO for last weeks predictions. Although I did get the Demons right, and Norf choking (although I didn't realise that they'd choke THAT badly), and I will admit that tipping against the Giants WAS purely out of spite. That out of the way, let's get to round two!
West Coast vs Carlton, Friday 10 April 6.10pm Subiaco.
SO glad I'm not a Carlton fan right now. No point in doing a quarter-by-quarter break-down, this is going to get NASTY.
West Coast by 50 points.
Richmond vs Footscray, Saturday 11 April 1.45pm MCG
Richmond are all arse and the Doggies are all guts so this could get interesting.
Q1: A tight contest, with Richmond pulling slightly ahead to finish the quarter 10 points ahead
Q2: The Doggies keep it tight, and manage to start pegging the Tigers back. Doggies win the quarter by 5 points
Q3: An armwrestle ensues, with the lack of polish from both clubs showing. Quarter is drawn.
Q4: At this stage, the Tigers are just that little bit stronger, but the Dogs push them to the end.
Richmond by 10 points
Giants vs Melbourne, Saturday 11 April 2.10pm, StarTrack Oval
Both teams are coming off wins, Melbourne unexpectedly.
Q1: Another close contest, with the Giants home-ground advantage helping them out (plus the fact that they have the greatest defender in the league on their team helps - I AM NOT LETTING THAT GO, JOEL PATFULL IS GOD!) to win the quarter by 10 points
Q2: Melbourne start to get a little hot under the collar as the Giants start to gain confidence. Giants win the quarter by 20 points
Q3: Inspired, the Giants start going ape, with Melbourne completely blown out of the water. Giants win the quarter by 15 points.
Q4: However, like last weekend, the Giants are still inexperienced and prone to burning out. Melbourne will win the quarter by 30 points, but in the end...
Giants by 15 points (PATFULLATED)
Collingwood vs Adelaide, Saturday 11 April 4.35pm Etihad
Adelaide ripped North Melbourne to shreds, while Collingwood just kept the Lions at bay.
Q1: Adelaide start the quarter off with a bang, and it looks like they're going for a repeat of last weekend only the Pies are a bit more savvy than North and peg them back. Adelaide win the quarter by 20 points
Q2: The Pies mount a counter-attack, but it's a case of too little too late as Adelaide push forward. Quarter ends up being drawn
Q3: Another fierce struggle, with neither side wanting to give an inch. Again, the quarter is drawn.
Q4: The Pies are left ruing the first quarter as Adelaide finally break free.
Adelaide by 30 points
Cold Toast Scums vs St. Kilda, Saturday 11 April 7.20pm Metripong
Scums are gonna win and that SUCKS.
Port vs Sydney, Saturday 11 April 7.10pm Adelaide Oval
This will be a cracker of a game, Port only just lost to Freo at home while Sydney had to fight back a win from the Dons.
Q1: Sydney won't be wanting to get off on the wrong foot again, especially not away and against a superior Port, and they'll end up winning a close quarter by 6 points.
Q2: Port won't be happy about being shown up on their home turf and will start fighting back to win the quarter by 13 points.
Q3: Home ground advantage becomes more prominent as Port begin to break away. Port win quarter by 10 points
Q4: A desperate fight back from the Swans fails as Port keep them at bay.
Port (yick) by 20 points.
Geelong vs Fremantle, Sunday 12 April, 1.10pm Kardinia Park
I got nuffin. Seriously, WTF Geelong? Before last week I would have had this as a tight contest with Geelong just winning but now it's all completely up in the air what with Freo holding Port at bay and Geelong getting hammered by Hawthorn and it's a Geelong home game and Freo have beaten Geelong at home within the past few years and screw tipping this round!
Essendon vs Hawthorn, Sunday 12 April, 3.20pm MCG
If I hear one more Dons fan talk about "match fitness" I'm going to demand that the AFL ban the entire team for being a right royal pain in the buns! That being said, I don't think any amount of match fitness would save any team from Hawthorn right now.
Q1: I expect Essendon to give it a good bash though, and maybe even get a bit ahead. Dons to win the quarter by 5 points.
Q2: I also expect Hawthorn to have all the answers. Hawthorn to win the quarter by 25 points.
Q3: I don't expect Essendon to give up without a fight. Still, Hawthorn win the quarter by 5 points.
Q4: Hawthorn will show their class in this quarter and completely dismantle the Dons.
Hawthorn by 40 points.
North Melbourne vs the BRISBANE LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIONS, Sunday 12 April, 4.40pm, Etihad
This will be an interesting one. Many people are going by the logic that since North lost, they're going to come good this week in their usual topsy-turvy way. HOWEVER, their miraculous turnarounds only seem to happen after they manage to choke away their leads, NOT after complete and utter pummellings. On the other hand, the Lions have a habit of losing badly to North at Etihad only to make it up at the Gabba later on in the year. Flip a coin people, this one is anyones guess.
Lions by 8 points.
(This blog is intended as advice only - and if you take said advice you should seriously consider seeing a mental health professional. Like, now.)